I'm working at Starbucks for a bit today.  Not "my" Starbucks, but instead the one by my parents' place.

This location is where I spent hour after hour, day after day, trying to adjust to a new old life over 10 years ago.

I had moved back home after being out on my own a couple thousand miles away on the West Coast.

And I tried to adjust by writing.

Are you familiar with NaNoWriMo?  It stands for something like National Novel Writing Month, and I think it's officially some month during the fall season, but that year I wrote during August I think. 

The goal of NaNoWriMo is to write an entire novel (50,000 words) in one month.
I didn't reach that goal.
But I wrote my heart out.
It was my way to process the huge life adjustment that I was undergoing.

It was a couple months after that that I started "blogging" via MySpace.

Ha ha, MySpace...  Can you call it blogging if it's not on a real blog?

I guess if I can participate in NaNoWriMo (that is seriously NOT easy to type, by the way) in August, I can blog via MySpace, huh?

Today I posed the question on the social media pages I manage for a small business, "What is your too-good-to-be-true dream job?"

For me, this is it.

Writing.

It's kind of scary to admit it.

But I'm learning to embrace it.
To pursue it.
To study it.
To grow it.

I believe God has gifted us individually with talents and passions and skills, and my gift is writing and encouraging.

This year I'm trying to remove the excess stuff in my schedule.  The stuff I'm not gifted in but I'm somehow still participating in.  It's not a goal to remove those items so I can just have a more simplified life or more time to relax and play Candy Crush.  It's so I can have more time to practice and strengthen my gifts.

This is me.  My one life.  I want to be the best me I can be and live the life that He has called it to be.

With a name like Very Sleepy Girl, it shouldn't surprise you that I am often tired.

Some days of being endlessly on the go, I get home and just want to sit on my Ikea Ektorp sofa, put my slipper covered feet up on my second-hand painted coffee table, and just rest for a moment.

But, a certain four-year-old in my house expects three meals a day.

Thankfully we've got her doing a self-serve breakfast most days, but that still leaves two other meals to prepare.

Every now and then, I'll do one of these Fill in the Blanks/Finish this Sentence type blog posts.  Living In Yellow did one, so I felt inspired to do so, as well.

Throwing a fit about:  Facebook not working for me.  I was having problems with it last night.  Just tried again this afternoon, and ... even worse.  Grrrr.  Oh well, it's probably a good thing, as it is likely my biggest time waster online.

I hate winter.

I say this every year.

Fortunately, we had a really "warm" December.

Unfortunately, it spoiled me.

Now the reality has hit.


Don't get me wrong:  it's pretty.  If I don't have to go out in it.

But on the days I do have to go out in it ...

in the bitter cold,
on narrow county roads,
full of icy intersections,
and sudden massive drifts of snow from countless open fields,
to, not only take my girl to preschool,
but also pick up her classmate from his babysitter's,
his Amish babysitter,
who I have no way of contacting,
and then when the car doesn't start...

Oh my, let's just say, there were tears.
Tears and prayers.

And frantic phone calls.

And my oh so helpful daughter was saying things like, "You have to make it start, mommy."

Thanks...

I got to the point where I had done everything I could think of, and I said to myself, "I'll just give it one more try."

And this time it sounded a bit different.

Like it was actually trying.

Like it could actually work.

I gave it some gas, and it revved up.

I heard the Hallelujah Chorus, and off we were on our way.

Oh, sweet hearts, do you feel like me and my van?

Thinking you just can't do another day.

Just can't keep fighting another battle with what you are facing in life.
Just can't keep trying in a broken, loveless marriage.
Just can't keep giving of your sleep, your strength, your entire self for your needy children.
Just can't keep putting in all the efforts into another area that goes unappreciated and unrecognized.

Whatever you have to do, whisper, declare, speak, yell, or proclaim to yourself, "I'll just give it one more try."

 
And don't allow yourself to carry the burden on your own.  Get help.
Open up.  Be vulnerable.  Share with someone who can help.

Maybe it means seeking counseling from a pastor or a mentor couple in order to hit the refresh button on your marriage.
Maybe it means a friend watching your kids while you go treat yourself to a cup of coffee, a matinee, or a nap.
Maybe it means better self care and giving yourself permission to take care of you.
Maybe it means removing extraneous obligations and activities from your schedule so you can focus on the passions that really motivate you.

Reflect on what God is placing on your heart right now, and see what you can do to give it one more try.

Well, No Spend January, we decided Date Night was worth a bit of cheating.

Hubs and I had a coupon and a gift card to Chili's.

But then I just had to have my half Diet Coke/half Cherry Coke combo.

And we had a great server, so we gave a large tip.

Then we decided to rent a Redbox.  Fortunately, we had a discount code.

So between dinner and a movie we ended up spending about $9.

It was worth it.

We are attempting to do a No Spend Month.

We did this two years ago and called it a Spending Freeze.

Whichever terminology you use, I think you get the gist of it.

I suppose the details can be set by each person individually.  For us, it means we can still get grocery necessities, but we do try to use up more food already in our pantry and freezer.

It's been super hard.

We still treat ourselves to some restaurant meals, thanks to gift cards.

And I've bought a couple cups of coffee with coins from my "piggy bank."

My version of a piggy bank.  Yes, I literally brought it with me to the coffee house.

Yesterday I heard Target had 90% off Christmas clearance.  I decided I had to go.

What can I say?  I'm weak.

Especially when it comes to Target.

Fortunately, or unfortunately, there really wasn't much we needed.  We just got a couple holiday food items and bought them with a gift card.

I've said this for years:  I would love to take part in an experiment to see the impact Target has on me physically.  I know the effects it has on me mentally and emotionally, but I would like to see if my breathing and heart rate increase when I enter the store or when I spot a clearance section.  So, if you hear of anyone conducting such an experiment, let them know I'm a willing participant.

Anyways, it's only one week in.  We'll see how the next three go.

Sigh...  Anyone want to take me to lunch?

Coffee?

Anyone have any tips for surviving a No Spend Month?

You guys, I have random Catherine quotes all over the place.  It would be nice if I could put them all in one place.  My non-smart phone (yep, still got it after all these years) has a bit of space to write memos or notes, and I'm running out of room there because of so many Catherine quotes.  So, I figured it was time to dump some here.  In no particular order, some even go back to when she was just two years ago.  All pictures are from June, 2014.

Me:  "You have one left foot and one right foot."
C:  "Aww, but I wanted two right feet."
12/16/14

"What a beautiful morning, God!  Thank you for a new day!"
10/3/15 (actually she says this quite a bit, but this was the first time I heard it)

"Oh my brother!"
(a cross between Oh brother and Oh my goodness)
12/8/15



"Look at her stylish hair!"
(didn't know she knew that word!)
12/4/15

"My headache hurt a few days ago.  It was when I was six or something."
12/4/15

"I was wide asleep.  I did so goodly."
12/2/15

"I have to buy some more ice cream at Lowes."
6/27/14

"Do you feel like an orphan?"
11/18/15



"I'm having a hard trouble."
11/18/15

"Close your eyes so you don't ear any noise."
11/15/15

"Catherine had a long day."
11/22/13

Burped, then said, "Excuse.  Excuse all of me."
1/3/14

"Oh grief.  What earth is going on here?"
1/27/14

"I feel like a morning star!"
3/2/14



"I don't have a cowboy hat, so I have to buy one at the store."
6/9/14

C:  "The Bible says we can make a mess.  The Bible says we can eat food."
Me: "Where?"
C:  "In the french room.  With me."
3/17/15



"What's mommy thinking about ?"
3/18/15

C:  "What's boss mean?"
Me:  "Why?  Where did you hear that word?"
C:  "From school."
3/19/15 (this was before she went to school)

"I very miss you."
3/20/15

C, semi awake in her bed, "Where's my paci?"
Me: "I don't know. Where is it?"
C: "Hiding."
Me:  "Is it hiding?"
C:  "Yep", falls back asleep
12/22/13

"Holy goodness sakes!"
12/24/15

"Where's my husband Daddy?"
8/2/14

"My butt feels gas in it."
4/23/14

Me: "Go tell Daddy, 'Put a bird on it.'"
C:  "Daddy, you wanna put it on a bird on it."
4/4/14

"I have snot coming out of my nose!"
(She didn't) 4/5/14



While watching giraffes on a dvd, "He's gonna eat bacon."
4/1/14 (I later realized she thinks the giraffe's tongue is bacon)

Me as C "measures" me with a phone, "How tall am I?"
C:  "Big!  So you can cut cheese."
8/14  (Taken from being told knives aren't for kids to use)

Me, after burping: "Excuse me."
C:  "Did you just gas at me?!"
2/23/15

"Dear Jesus, please help my corn to cool so I can eat it.  Amen."
4/27/15

When my brother married Jen, not only did I gain the sister I always wanted, but I also gained a whole extended family.

Their family has welcomed us all warmly and considers us as family.

We celebrate holidays together.  I think the only Christmas not spent with them was when we were in Jamaica on our honeymoon.

My favorite holiday tradition is that we all go caroling on Christmas day to a local nursing home.  Jen's mom Gloria plays the accordion, and we all make a joyful noise proclaiming the Savior's birth.  We wear Santa hats, ring bells, and bless the residents and staff.

Christmas 2009

But this year was different.

Gloria's dad, who I know as "Grandpa Virgil", went to be with Jesus on Christmas day.

It's been an emotional last few days.  And while I don't want to step on toes of Grandpa Virgil's true relatives, it has hurt like a loss of my own grandparent.

Virgil was the last person who I could refer to as Grandpa; my only other passed away long ago when I was in junior high school.  Losing Grandpa Virgil brought up memories of losing my other grandparents.  That hurt never goes away completely.  Losing another just brings it to the forefront of my mind.

After Grandpa heard I got engaged, he had another ring to give me.

Grandpa Virgil was always there with a smile and a story and a joke.

He danced at our wedding reception.

He traveled Europe at age 80.

He rode in a go-kart at age 88.

He never missed a chance to have fun.

He is a person who truly lived life.  Not just sitting on the sidelines watching.

He also never missed a chance to talk about Jesus and the importance of a relationship with the Lord in life.

Grandpa celebrating at my 30th birthday party

Over the last few days, there have been a lot of stories told, memories shared, and tears shed.  Today was a final memorial service.  It was a beautiful time honoring Grandpa Virgil and celebrating that He is with Jesus now.  And oh what a wonderful time they are having together.  As soon as I heard the news of his passing, though sadness filled my being and tears filled my eyes, I could still smile.  I could truly picture Grandpa Virgil in heaven, rejoicing and celebrating our Savior's birth with the One of honor.

We will miss you, Grandpa!