Every now and then, I'll do one of these Fill in the Blanks/Finish this Sentence type blog posts.  Living In Yellow did one, so I felt inspired to do so, as well.

Throwing a fit about:  Facebook not working for me.  I was having problems with it last night.  Just tried again this afternoon, and ... even worse.  Grrrr.  Oh well, it's probably a good thing, as it is likely my biggest time waster online.

Things I Love Right Now

• pockets (sadly, 99% of what I wear doesn't have pockets.  However, I have a pair of pants that are thicker and, therefore, worn more during the colder months that has pockets.  Needless to say, I've been delighted to wear them in the recent days.)

• apple cider (I just had my first of the season.  Always a great fall staple!)
  
• updates from old friends (just heard from a friend from long ago in California)

• dance parties with my family (in the kitchen, in the car, at Charissa's reception... There has been a lot of family dancing lately.  It's so fun!)

• the phrase "It doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful." (I am holding on tight to this one from The Nester as I update our home.)

• updating my Linked In profile (never thought I'd have any interest in this, and it wasn't my plan to even have a Linked In profile, but with my new job, comes lots of new things, and I've realized it is a good thing to boost my online professional appearance.)

• hearing Catherine sing (Lately she's always asking for a CD.  I didn't realize how quickly she was learning new songs until yesterday when she could suddenly sing about 80% of a song she just started listening to.  And it was from a CD of choir songs from my time in LA.)

• making decor updates to our home (in addition to changing our guest bedroom to my office, I'm trying to determine which furniture and other items we can part with.  I also finally painted our front door!)

  Ta-da!  Hooray for this Not a DIY-er!!

• embracing my unique style (Josh and I rarely agree on the same things, so it's not surprising then that we have different styles when it comes to how to decorate and arrange our home.  He has just started to give me more free reign, and I've been strongly drawn to some very unique things - artwork and chairs, specifically.  I'm learning it's ok to have my own quirky style, and it's ok to enjoy quirky things.  One of these days, I'll post pictures of the crazy unique additions.

• my boss (as I struggle to be a professional again and to figure out child care and family dynamics, I'm so grateful for an encouraging boss who sees my positive qualities and seeks to bring out the best in me.  It is a big time of transition, but he is patient and believes that family is a bigger priority than a job.)

Awhile ago I did these lists of "Things I Like Right Now".  I thought I'd post another.

• home decor
• "You're a Good, Good Father"
• re-thinking home decor
• peace
• baskets/containers
• re-arranging things from room to room
• crazy artwork
• rest
• space
• date night
• getting stuff out of our house
• Zillow
• pad thai
• watching football with Catherine
• small town Wakarusa, IN
• getting deals at yard sales
• Ben's soft pretzels
• the quote "not my monkey, not my circus"
• snuggling up with a soft, cozy blanket
• being encouraged, affirmed, and built-up
• encouraging other women
• "No Longer Slaves"
• finding my adventure
• a second cup of coffee
• deepening friendships

Believe or not, Josh is already back to work, and the local kids are already back in school.

This summer break was the shortest ever - 8 weeks.  We are so grateful, though, for that perk of his occupation!!

About the beginning of June or so, I wrote up a little list of things I wanted to get done this summer.  How'd we do?

• Purge (still doing)
• Organize (this is really slow going, but I'm working on it)
• Decorate (work in progress, but mostly comes after the organizing; also, this is really hard to measure/assess)
• Hang pics/gallery wall (nope)
• Paint front door (I've narrowed it down to 3 colors, and really 1 I think, but it's not the same one that hubby wants, so for now we just have 3 red paint swatches taped to our front door, can you say ghetto?)

• Grill pizzas (still gotta do this)
• Dentist appointments for all 3 of us (appointments made and scheduled for this week!  It will be C's first dentist experience!  She's excited; I hope I don't make her nervous.)
• Wonderland Theater (Josh and I got to see "Paper Towns" as a Thursday matinee - when all you can eat popcorn is free, woot woot!)
• Buy a new vacuum
• Buy a dirt devil/dustbuster
• Host a yard sale (done!  times 2!)

• Go on a couples trip (Josh & I celebrated our 5th anniversary with a trip to Michigan - Saginaw, Birch Run, Traverse City)

• Go on a family trip (sorry, kid.)
• Camp in our backyard
• Use our firepit
• Make smores
• Teach C how to wipe her bottom independently (a good thing to know how to do especially considering she starts pre-school in a month!)
• Get estimates for windows (ugh.  I feel like I need to get my house organized first.)
• Stain the back deck (ahem)
• Go to the beach (we went when Josh's Las Vegas family was in town; then Catherine & I went again with her cousins and aunt)

Sadly, there was no big family road trip this summer.  But maybe we can do some little trips on the weekends.  I know things will be different with Catherine now having her own school schedule to consider, so we'll just have to be diligent to use the time we have!

Just for fun, some random things about me.  Maybe some you know, maybe some you don't.

1.  My favorite time is 12:34.
2.  My least favorite time is 12:35.
3.  I was born at 12:35 AM.
4. I think 4 is the ideal amount of children to have.
5. I can barely handle having 1 child.
6.  I'm not good with numbers.
7.  I don't like going a day without coffee.
8.  My husband and I went on two honeymoons.
9.  My husband and I had a science class together in college but didn't actually meet until years later via eharmony.  Crazy, huh?!
10.  I love Oriental food and grew up eating with chopsticks.
11. As a child, we had two different Asian students live with our family for awhile.
12.  One summer during college, I worked with foreign exchange students from China.
13.  I did 3 months of student teaching in Okinawa, Japan at the same school where my dad taught many years prior.
14.  I've never been stung by a bee.
15.  I've never been on a roller coaster.
16.  My memory is so bad I can usually watch a movie two or three times and still be surprised by the ending.
17.  Shakespeare makes me fall asleep.
18.  I wake up with a headache if I sleep in too much.
19.  I have a degree in Elementary Education.
20.  I rarely watch TV.
21.  I don't like mushrooms - taste OR texture!
22.  I wear makeup only a couple times a year.
23.  I can name all the Presidents in order.
24.  I have a collection of cookbooks but rarely cook.
25.  I'm 36 (I think - see #6 above), and I still don't know what to do with my life.

A few days prior, Josh asked me what I wanted for Mother's Day.

I was pleasantly surprised that he asked.  So, since he did, I answered:

1. I want to sleep in.
2. I want breakfast in bed.
3. I want a card that you put time and thought into.
4. I want a massage.
5. And when we go out with extended family for a celebratory lunch on Mother's Day, I don't want to sit next to my daughter.

"WHAT?" you may be asking, "You don't want to sit next to your daughter on Mother's Day??  Who says that?!"

I do.

When I am with my daughter (which is a great majority of my time), I am on duty.  I'm entertaining.  I'm answering questions.  I'm telling her to sit down.  I'm finding her cup.  I'm looking at the children's menu.  I'm cleaning up spills.  She's pulling on my hair, my arm, my shirt.  She's kissing my sleeve with a food covered face.  She's crawling in my lap.  She's tipping her chair.  She's dropping crayons.  She's drawing on the wall.  She's grabbing a knife.

The above is not an exaggeration.  It is the norm.

There's nothing relaxing about it.  It's stressful.  And exhausting.  And I wanted a break from it.

And, for the most part, I got what I asked for.

I didn't get to "sleep in" per se, but at least I wasn't the default to deal with a boisterous toddler at 7 in the morning.

Josh then had a little helper in the kitchen while he made coffee and crepes (YUM!) and served me in bed.

I received a meaningful card from hubby and a homemade card from Catherine, both very appropriate.

No word on the massage yet, but I'm ok with that, especially considering the cost.

And I got to spend most of our lunch three seats away from my daughter!  I got to enjoy eating my food on my own time table.  I got to have uninterrupted conversations with those around me, which is probably one of the greatest losses for me since having a child.  And I even managed to finish the meal without any food stains being added to my attire!

As an added bonus, I got flowers!




Thank you, Josh, for asking, for listening, and for all you did to grant my wishes and make me feel special.

The other night part of me felt like blogging something, and part of me felt like just browsing Pinterest.  So, I combined them both into this:

Random thoughts while scrolling through Pinterest...

oh dear, step by step directions on how to make heart shaped pancakes; yes, it's that time again!

why do recipes keep showing up in my pinterest feed??  grrr, just give me home decor!

seriously, why do i have to keep unfollowing the same boards again and again?!

"how to clean your whole house in one hour" - they haven't seen MY house!

mmmm, brie.  i have a love affair with brie.  (that's a cheese, folks; just in case i needed to clarify)

"lipstick art"???

i wish i knew what i wanted to create (and, no, it isn't lipstick art!)

homemade ketchup??  for when you clearly have too much free time

i heart free printables.  not that i ever actually print any of them...

white kitchen LOVE!!

fashion schmashion

you can freeze eggs???

oh, i'm supposed to clean my car vents??

baby sleep tips - don't need those anymore

my chalkboard writings never look that pretty!

homemade heart shaped marshmallows.   ay, yi, yi.

really?  there's a formula for how to decorate or design a room?!

yes, lemon and blueberries - i was just telling catherine how much i love this combo!

wood paneled shower??  not sure about that one...

yes, this is what i have been wanting in between our kitchen and laundry room!!

how to declutter your day - just what i need!

one word:  shiplap!

Feeling giddy and full of love and happiness at this moment.  Even though we are a household of sickies - coughs and colds, we have much to be thankful for.

So glad for our extended family nearby.

For extended in-laws who invite us into their family and into their home.  To share their food and their family traditions.

For singing and Christmas caroling.

For Christmas lights and Christmas trees.  Ornaments that Catherine helped put on the tree this year.

For this angel of ours who got to participate in her first Christmas pageant:


For generosity and unexpected gifts in the mail.

For Christmas cards - the ones we send and the ones we receive.  Even the ones where we don't even know the sender.  Ha!

For Christmas Break and times of rest and extra sleep.

For coffee, tea, hot chocolate, and other beverages to keep us warm and toasty.

For unexpected warmer temps and even a bit of sunshine this week.

For celebrating the holiday three days in a row with three sets of family.

For the kick I get when people ask Catherine if Santa is bringing her lots of presents, and she has no idea what they're talking about.  Santa WHO??

For fun, family Christmas movies we can watch together - Charlie Brown and White Christmas this year.

For almost escaping the holiday season without hearing "Christmas Shoes" - so close!!

For anticipating a trip to IKEA and goodies to bring home to make our house homier.

This makes me happy.

I went to a really awesome Women's Retreat last week.  And it's got me thinking a lot about the expectations of being a "good mom" or a "perfect wife" or a "Proverbs 31 woman".

• own a big house
• invite people over often
• clean that big house
• make meals
• make healthy meals
• organic, gluten free, GMO free meals
• no fast food
• meal plan
• make freezer meals
• make meals for others
• bake coookies
• keep a full cookie jar
• have clear kitchen counters
• have granite countertops
• serve in the church
• nursery duty Sunday
• nursery duty Wednesday
• attend Bible study
• host Bible study
• attend small group
• host small group
• have daily devotions
• have daily family devotions
• have daily devotions with husband
• have a happy marriage
• have lots of sex
• have lots of children
• sacrificially give up sleep
• sew
• own a minivan
• drive other people's kids around
• take the neighborhood to church
• take the church to the neighborhood
• serve the less fortunate
• make memories for child(ren)
• have craft time with child
• give up coffee
• go to bed early
• get up early
• exercise
• daily laundry
• mop
• wear an apron
• wear makeup
• wear heels
• have nice matching furniture that isn't second-hand or stained
• have a queen or king sized bed
• . . .

It keeps going and going.
It's enough to make me crumble.
And weep.
And give up.

Because [clearly] I can't do it all.

The question I keep coming back to is "Where do these expectations come from?"

God never called me to be Super Woman.  He's the One I say I live for and care about.  Then why am I stressing about doing all these other things that He's never called me to do?

One point our speaker made at the retreat is that God's not calling me to do, do, do.  He's calling me to be.

To be His daughter.  To be in His presence.

Look at the Bible passage about Mary and Martha in Luke 10:38-42.
Oh, this story has always made me squirm.

Because, like Martha, I'm a doer.  I think of all the work that needs to be done.  And I try to do it.  And then I get ticked off when others aren't doing their fair share.

In this passage, Martha is feeling the same way.  And Jesus totally calls her out on it, and says she can stop trying to do it all.  He never asked her to do it all.  In fact He doesn't want her to do it all.  He wants her to just be.  To sit at His feet and to be with Him.

Oh, Lord, can I do that?  Is it possible to overlook the messy house and the overflowing baskets of laundry and the over-scheduled calendar to focus on what You have truly called me to do??



My friend Lisa-Jo just wrote about NOT Doing It All.  Her honesty was much appreciated and needed.  The part that impacted me the most was kind of some behind-the-scenes information.  The "story behind the photo" if you will.

A couple days prior she had posted a photo of her sweet kiddos all lined up in a row, sitting nicely on the couch, all happy and well fed with bowls of food in their laps.  It was cute.  Of course.


Then I found out the story behind the photo:  Lisa-Jo had just gotten home from traveling out of town for a few days to a conference where she was a speaker.  Though she was delighted to be home and with her kids again, she was also exhausted.  She got Chinese take-out, put it in bowls, lined them up on the couch with dinner and Netflix while she napped.

Can I get a "Hallelujah" for a nap?
Can I get a "Hallelujah" for such honesty?
Can I get a "Hallelujah" for takeout and tv for those moments when we just can't do it all and we need to be real and ok with that?

Another friend's husband recently posted "Judging by my facebook feed, if you haven't taken your kids to an apple orchard or a pumpkin patch yet this fall, you're a horrible parent."  Though obviously tongue-in-cheek, it puts into explicit words what we may be feeling tinges of when we compare our lives to those showing up in our newsfeed.

I can't allow others' snippets of life and snapshots momentarily on display to decide the expectations of my day-to-day reality.

Lord, help me to know what YOU expect of me.  May I strive for only the things that bring glory to you.

Not to get all Martha Stewart on you or anything, but I've just been more aware lately of these good things...

• my little family
• play dates
• hospitality
• girls night out
• community
• learning more about myself
• listening to God
• The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst
• pedicures
• a new hair-do
• weekly accountability
• new friendships
• Catherine learning and growing

• thanking God for my blessings
• the crispness of fall
• pumpkin recipes
• simplicity
• getting to miss my family on occasion IE time spent apart
• parents & in-laws
• having many of Catherine's aunts, uncles, and cousins nearby
• the tremendous amount of work my husband does for our family
• looking forward to Fall Break
  
  
  
  
  

1. I believe... in forgiveness and second chances.
2. The first concert I attended was... Johnny Cash.
3. It's important to have... friends.
4. I would love to go... back to Portland (Maine).
5. If I had more time... I'd get my home organized, but I'd need more energy too.
6. I like to... sleep.  (In case you didn't catch that whole VerySleepyGirl name of this blog)
7. Some of my proudest achievements are... student teaching overseas, moving to the west coast, and moving back home to the Midwest.
8. When I was a teenager... I made my parents' lives miserable.
9. Someday I would love to... get our upstairs bathroom painted.
10. My favorite thing to bake is... crepes currently.  Or would that be considered cooking?  I don't know.  Do you bake crepes or cook crepes?
11. What you don't know about me is... how badly I'm trying to figure out what to do with my life.
12. I once had a part-time job... babysitting at age 10.  I was so not mature enough for that!
13. I am currently working... for free.
14. My favorite celebrity meeting was... Mario Lopez!!
15. I like to drink... coffee every morning.
16. My favorite movie idol is... Julie Andrews.  "The hills are alive!!!!!"
17. My favorite flowers are... colorful and bright and vibrant and long-lasting!
18. I like to snack on... sweet and salty combos.
19. My favorite TV show is... currently Fixer Upper on HGTV.  I really don't want much TV, and we don't get HGTV, so...
20. I met my husband... officially in let's see here... um, working backwards, we were married in 2010, so... um, let's see, engaged in 2009, so 2008 I guess.  Is that right, sweetie?  (I'm not good with numbers/dates/facts)
21. I would love to have dinner with... a bunch of old friends at a backyard barbeque.  Oh, that may come true here shortly...
22. My favorite color is... blue in varying shades - mostly aqua and navy.
23. I enjoy... sleeping writing.
24. I attended... Christian schools almost entirely.
25. I am a huge fan of... Candace Cameron.
26. I collect... colanders.  For decoration.  Or as Catherine would say, "For pretend."
27. I appeared... as an extra in a movie.
28. I also collect... travel size toiletries from hotels.  Ha!
29. My favorite fruit is... fruit pizza!  No, seriously, I love lots of different fruits - honeydew, blueberries, kiwi, strawberries, grapes, bananas, peaches, etc.  But I also do love a good fruit pizza!
30. My go-to beauty product is... Burt's Bees lip balm.  That's as close as I get to "beauty products."
31. In 2009 I... went to Arkansas, Nevada, California, and Texas.
32. I recently... went through South Dakota, North Dakota, Montana, Idaho, Oregon, and Washington for the first time.
33. I am inspired by... Pinterest.
34. I wear glasses... every day since 8th grade.
35. In 1997 I... went to New York City with my high school classmates.
36. I work out... used to work out at Curves and later a gym.
37. I'm a terrible... cook.
38. What I love about America is... how much there is to experience.
39. My secret snack... is anything after Catherine is asleep.
40. I adore... rain when I don't have to go out in it.
41. It's been a really long time since... I got my hair cut.  I was seriously contemplating pigtails the other day.
42. I'm so thankful for... a dishwasher in our kitchen.  Especially after seven years without!  Good things come to those who wait.
43. I don't want to... own a red car.  Too much attention from police.
44. I once forgot... how to spell "world."  This was last week.
45. I have... a great guy (my husband - just to clarify in case you were thinking Mario Lopez).
46. I wish I had... disposable income.
47. I don't know how to... play chess.  I once started reading a book on how to play chess.  I don't think I made it past the first page.
48. Yesterday I... ate a yummy Asian sesame chicken salad.
49. Tomorrow I... will get up and drink coffee.  The rest is uncertain.
50. I wonder... when I'll tire of chevron.  I also wonder if anyone actually read ALL 50 of these random facts.

Currently reading...

• articles on how to survive a road trip with back pain

Currently eating...

• Smoked sausage roll from Rise 'n Roll

Currently drinking...

• Kiwi Strawberry Snapple - old school!

Currently missing...

•  Auntie Barb & Cousin Monique

Currently watching...

• nothing on tv, but we did just receive a mammoth antennae that will allow us to actually get local channels

Currently rearranging...

• kitchen, front room, and living room - mentally

Currently stressing...

• planning packing for the road trip

Currently baking...

• nothing; four very ripe bananas ended up in the freezer after I talked about making banana bread for days

Currently lamenting...

• the extremely short lifespan of our kiddie pool

Currently enjoying...

• www.thesaurus.com

Currently harvesting...

• spinach, lettuce, strawberries, raspberries, basil

 Currently attempting...

• to figure out multiple annoying technological problems affecting me simultaneously (computer won't charge; phone won't send pictures to email or facebook)

Currently anticipating...

• being with Roomie Sarah

 Currently singing...

• How Can I Keep From Singing

Currently dreaming...

• about space (not of the outer variety) and working at my former job (recurring dream)

Currently creating...

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