When You Are Called To The Crazy

January 28, 2019

It's been so long since I've written on this blog that I had to relearn where to go to compose a new post. I make no guarantees about the frequency of posting, but I have had a strong desire to write again so that's why I'm here.

Since you last heard from me, our family has had the exciting, overwhelming, terrifying, life-changing experience of becoming licensed foster parents!

Room for More - in our hearts & in our home
I truly feel it is an honor to get to do, and God is showing me how much I can be stretched because it is absolutely life altering. I'm extremely grateful for the amount of support we have from our church, our small group, our family and friends, and neighbors. We also have an amazing foster agency (National Youth Advocate Program), who without their support I would not - could not - do this journey.

We currently have three teen boys ages 14, 16, and 17. And we're thinking of adding another. Ha!

Our boys are very good boys, and I'm so grateful. We've had them with us almost two months now and haven't had any issues. Until this past weekend.

In the grand scheme of things, the issue that arose this weekend was very minute. However, because it was the first sort of problem, and my husband was gone when it happened, it fell on me and felt like a big deal to my sensitive soul.

Quite simply, it was some disobedience and backtalk. I deal with that sort of stuff on a regular basis with our 7 year-old bio daughter without it being any sort of problem for me. But I'm not used to dealing with it from teenage boys.

It left me broken.

It left me questioning my abilities. "Am I really cut out for this foster parenting stuff? Am I strong enough for this?"

It left me rethinking if I can handle adding a fourth teenage boy to the mix.

This morning, the first day of a new school week, I struggled to get motivated as I looked out the windows and saw an abundance of fresh snow falling onto the piles already accumulated. I checked my social media feed and started reading a friend's post:

Sometimes, randomly, I’ll tell Jaxon a bible story and just paraphrase it to make it shorter for him to understand.  Tonight, for some odd reason, I felt the urge to tell him about Abraham and Isaac and how God asked Abe to kill/sacrifice his ONLY son Isaac as an offering. 

I have no idea why that specific story came to my mind, or why I thought it would be a good story to tell a 2 year old, but I went on telling the story with Jaxon mindlessly listening while bouncing around my bed. 

After the story, I explained to him that sometimes we have to do things God asks us to even if it doesn’t make sense to us or if we really don’t want to do what He is asking. We have to trust that God knows best and that He has a plan in all things. 

I opened my Bible tonight to finally jump on board with my church’s bible reading plan, and out of ALL the chapters in the Bible that could have been assigned for today, it was Genesis 21-23 which includes the exact story about Isaac and Abraham. There is no coincidence to this. 

I felt God wanted me to share this with you all to give you all some encouragement to trust God with whatever He has thrown your way. He will sometimes ask you to do things that don’t make sense, but in the end it is for a reason. Sometimes it might be to test us, as He did with Abraham, to see if we will follow through with a crazy request. 

God’s way is the best way. Trust him in all things.

You guys, taking three teen boys into your home sounds like a crazy thing. Adding a fourth sounds like a crazy thing. Raising somebody else's kids sounds like a crazy thing. Voluntarily offering to take kids who are traumatized sounds like a crazy thing.

But if God is calling you to it, don't you believe He's got your back?
I truly believe He will equip me as I follow through with what He has called me to do.

So, I emailed our foster agency.

"Let's take the next step. Let's see if we can take this 16 year old."

If it's not meant to be, God will place him elsewhere. But if it is meant to be, God will provide. We'll make room. We'll adjust. At this point anyways, crazy is becoming our new norm.

This is foster care.

*****

If you'd like to follow along for more stories, you can find me on Instagram @verysleepygirl

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