I wrote these throughout the day yesterday and was too tired to post by the time I was home for the night.

• I love that I just got an email inviting me to a seminar in Johannesburg!
• I could have used another 3 hours of sleep this morning.
• I'm thinking about tattoos again.
• My feet are freezing.
• I can't believe it is 50-something degrees!! Yet it is supposed to get above 80 today. This is crazy!
• 11 days til Des Moines!
• Oh snap! I really wish I had coffee and/or breakfast!
• Oh I hate when I screw up at work!
• I need to make more blueberry zucchini bread! It will be yummy, and I'm trying a healthier version this time!
• I love when my honey makes dinner for me. :)
• I can't believe ND football is less than 2 weeks away! I might have to figure out how to videotape things off my converter box because I will be out of town for some of the games. It's weird for me to think about NOT watching the games. Soooo not like me!!
• I just witnessed the best parallel parking job. And by "best" I mean most entertaining, IE worst.
• I am looking forward to dinner with J-La tonight!
• I love the thought of a fresh start. With my guest bedroom abandoned, I guess it feels kinda like a fresh start.
• Did someone say "DQ Thin Mint Cookie Blizzard"?!? I think I did!
• This is gonna be a BUSY week!!
• Kalamzoo, MI named the 6th meanest city in America!?! Shocking! Los Angeles named #1 - not so shocking.
• Today really wasn't that bad - surprising for a Monday.
• It's really good to have friends you can be real with!
  

The last couple few days I’ve been thinking quite a bit about my novel. My unfinished novel. I am pretty sure I’ve mentioned it before, but in case you forget I’ll recap. Summer of 2005 I was in a novel writing group based on the book No Plot No Problem. The goal was to write a novel in a month. Some people in the group met that goal. I, on the other hand, am still working on mine four years later. And I’m ok with that.

While I know it needs a lot of work (the goal was to write, not edit) and many more chapters, I am really proud of the storyline. More precisely, the end of the story. Which I am unable to tell you about. Come on, I can’t give it away!

I’m thinking about revisiting it, changing some of the details in the middle, cleaning it up a bit, and adding to it. The thought of being involved with those characters and those settings again stirs my creative spirit – something I am in desperate need of.

• I can't get enough of fresh locally grown produce.
• I can't get enough homemade zucchini bread. I just don't like the dirty dishes that come along with baking or cooking.
  
• I have a guest bedroom again. Yep, roomie Leah moved back home Saturday.
• Cherry flavored coffee is my new BFF.
• Josh & I celebrated 300 days together Sunday.
• I have to look into flights to Dallas. My dear friend Heather got engaged, and I'm in the wedding!
• Visited Elkhart's "farmers market" - the American Countryside Market. It was better than I expected. I had low expectations.
• I need to clean my house.
• I need to find some creative outlets; I feel my spirit slowly dying.
• I also need to find a new job. Budget cutbacks are making mine part-time starting in January.
• I heard Miley Cyrus coming out of my boss' office the other day. Some may say that is reason enough to search for a new job.
• I would wear flip flops every day if I could. Etiquette says they are not proper. I say proper schmoper (schmopper?). That's just the kind of gal I am.
• I think that Volkswagens will also hold a little piece of my heart.
• I really want to see "Julie & Julia", but I'm waiting til it goes to the Five Buck Club. Waiting eagerly!
• I love when I can hear my neighbor playing guitar.
  

i have written almost 500 blogs here.

and lately i question my purpose of the blogs.

since elementary school i have journaled. i have years and years of my thoughts written in various books. in the last couple years that has dwindled off so far that i am at the point where i can't even find my journal.

that makes me sad.

i feel like i've lost those 2 years. and very vital years they were.

does what i put out here replace what i would have written in my journal?

not quite.

i'm much more careful and guarded with what i write here. i censor myself. wisely i'd say. but none-the-less, it is not comparable to what i would be journaling.

i had a great day. i had a great yesterday. i had a great weekend away. i started typing up the details and got pretty far into it. and then just started wondering if anybody really cares to know about my days.

i know some of you out there read for your entertainment when boredom strikes during the day. or perhaps you are trying to learn more about me (sidenote: good luck; so am i!).

but why? what does it do for you? why do you want me to share my life with you? why are you here? what keeps you coming back? basically - what's in it for you?

anonymous (or identified) comments appreciated as i ponder where to go from here.

I will admit I have been a little negligent with blogging lately. But I won't confess that as something bad. I always say I'd rather be out living life than just writing about it.

I am filled with joy tonight. So many reasons. Tomorrow is a vacation day. Josh & I got to go up to Niles to hang out with Mike (a good friend of mine from college) as well as his youth group. He's a youth pastor now working in Des Moines, and he is currently leading his kids on an Amazing Race across the Midwest! The kids have no idea where they're going or what they're doing. As they travel, they are growing closer to each other, closer to God with devotions Mike is leading every day, and they are serving others along the way. They're also doing some pretty outrageous stuff to win points for their team!

There are 3 teams - Red, Green, and Blue. They are frequently posting updates, photos, and video while they journey. You can take a look at their blogs for a peak into the craziness! It was such a great experience to be a part of it tonight! Here's a picture of the hottest wings you can find in the area. You can check out the videos I posted on my facebook to see what happened with the wings!

Also, I planned part of their adventure while in the area here. I can't share yet what they'll be up to tomorrow (it's still a secret!), but I know they will have fun! :)

I wish I could be around to watch it unfold tomorrow, but I am leaving town at 6 AM. Another reason to be full of joy. Well, not the 6 AM part, but... I am excited for the trip. Josh's mom Janice, my mom, and myself, along with a few other ladies who I don't know are driving down to Indianapolis to join thousands of other ladies for Women of Faith - a Christian women's retreat. It will be all day Friday and all day Saturday, and then we'll drive back Saturday night. I've wanted to go to one of these for awhile, so when Janice invited me, I jumped at the chance.

I'd better get packing, huh?! 5 AM is gonna come very soon!