I can't remember when exactly it first started.
I was working at the non-profit at the time.  So somewhere between 2006 and 2010.

Back pain.

Excrutiating back pain.
Debilitating back pain.

Not really sure of the cause.
Or the cure.
Other than time.  And rest.

Since then it's returned a few times.
Including today.

So I am stuck in bed.  And in SO.MUCH.PAIN.  Like can't-even-stand-up-or-bend-over pain.

I'm thinking of all the things I will miss out on now because of this.  How I have to rearrange things in my schedule.  How to try to deal with Catherine while being confined to a bed.  She showed up at one point in my bed completely bottomless.  No idea what happened to her diaper.  But I managed to put a clean diaper on her all while laying flat on my back.  Not gonna lie - I was pretty impressed with myself.

I don't put this on facebook.  I don't tend to go public with pain.  But it's the truth.

I don't like admitting my weakness.  I'm not good at asking for help.  I have a hard time praying for myself.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.  ~ 2 Cor. 12:9-10